What is the best way to get self-feedback?
Your relationships are the best way to get self feedback. By relationships I mean, relationship to your work, to things, to people and to ideas.
Your relationships will show conflict in different forms. All your feelings arise in relationship. You feel fear, desire, anger, hurt, pride, failure…..all in your relationships.
What does one do when gets these feelings? One usually attacks, or defends, or one suppresses, and controls them. We never watch these feelings and learn from them. Whenever any feeling arises we judge the feeling, calling it right or wrong, good or bad. When we judge our thoughts and feelings, we stop learning. Because we do not allow the feeling to show things about ourselves. It we do not judge a feeling then the feeling will start revealing things about ourselves.
Have you ever tried watching any thought or feeling without judging it, changing it, suppressing it or condemning it. Try doing it and you will see how difficult it is to do this. You always have a set of beliefs in your mind about what is right and wrong or good and bad. So each time a feeling arises, your belief acts and you shut the feeling or act from it. Or, if you allow the feeling to be without changing it, you fear going into something unknnown.
The only way to learn about yourself, from your own self is to understand how to watch your thoughts and feelings without trying to change them in any way. Then you do not need any teacher. Then your anger teaches you, your fear teaches you, your hurt teaches you. You have to allow these feelings to teach you. Then you don’t need to go to any teacher, guide or expert to help you learn about yourself. Anyways, all these teachers, guides and experts are just acting as if they know.